It's a big day. 40 days out from birth is a big marker in traditional societies because finally Mom and Baby are out of the initial danger of the newborn period. We would have been kept under close watch and totally cared for for all of this time and only now would be re-entering the world. I like that in some societies the woman is welcomed back much the same way a warrior is welcomed in returning from battle. And of course the baby is a proud addition to any clan.
40 days is just 2 days shy of 6 weeks. It is a powerful shift of a time and still only halfway to 12 weeks, when you finally turn out of the '4th trimester' of blob-hood into real personhood (the 3 month mark). At this point I feel so much stronger than I did even 2 weeks ago. I feel pretty good and Eli is doing amazingly -- eating up a storm, and sleeping a ton -- GROWING is his main agenda it seems.
I also feel a little sad today. The more and more we go out into the world (which I do think is good for me, and our family) the further and further we move from his birth and from the sweet sacred time of laying in. It will never come back and it was so short. That, and I've noticed there are only about 3 or 4 photos of me with him. All of this time we're practically glued together and not a picture of it around. It's like this time will totally disappear. It won't, I know. It's somewhere glued into our psyches. And thank goodness for it for both of us, it is transformative. But I do want to document it. (I cornered Max this morning and demanded that he take our photos more often)
Some things we've done as a family to make the first 6 weeks more smooth:
- Food delivery - Friends and family and schoolmates of Sabine brought in food. Not having to think of dinner plans every single night but still having healthy stuff to eat has been wonderful!
- HELP - we hired some help. We've had Holly come in two times a week and help us out with whatever we need. Sometimes it was driving Sabine, sometimes it was cooking, sometimes it was laundry. She drove me to his Dr appointments and even took me clothes shopping. just having an exra set of hands made all the difference in the world.
- Clothes - I went and got some new clothes. Nothing I owned before I got pregnant fits and I just felt awful wearing winter maternity clothes. So I went and picked up a few summer things in the right sizes and that makes me feel SO much better. Who cares what the size is? that doesn't matter. If I look good I feel good and I look better in real clothes than in sweats.
- Chiropractor - I had an adjustment at 3 weeks after Eli's birth and my entire body shape changed. I felt A-mazing. Wish I could do that every single week.
-Friends - so many friends have helped us out. What has been a real treat has been the number of playdates Sabine has been to. Every week someone from school has offered to keep her which really makes my days more manageable. I owe a LOT of favors next year, and that's fine. And just having friends to talk to and to text with about the shift has helped us too.
It's been a busy time but a magical time. I feel like I want him to stay a sweet little baby forever. But I guess a full-night's sleep would be welcome too. Ah.
earlier this week
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